


Wherever you stray, I follow (Anywhere else is hollow)

by prettysky



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Snow, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, a family is two lesbians and their over-energetic four-almost-five-year-old girl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:22:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28247589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettysky/pseuds/prettysky
Summary: They all went downstairs, Alex at the head, carrying Jamie with her shoulders hunched over. "I should have told Kara to be quieter.""It's okay." Maggie got on her tiptoes to kiss Alex's cheek. "Whatever you prepared for us, I'm sure it’s..."Her voice faded as she peered into the backyard. The yard, which was fenced with tall bushes and was filled with green grass and ornamental stones, had transformed completely overnight.
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer
Comments: 28
Kudos: 72
Collections: Secret Sanvers | A Sanvers Winter Holiday 2020 Event





	Wherever you stray, I follow (Anywhere else is hollow)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fandomfan13](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomfan13/gifts).



> Happy Holidays Bea! hope you'll like this one :)

“A butterfly."

"A butterfly," Alex repeated, looking up. She could see a butterfly flying away. "Why?"

"They are colorful, and can fly," said Jamie with the utmost importance.

"You're colorful too." Alex pointed to Jamie's clothes. She wore a striped dress with pink and orange, her purple sandals, and a blue bow that gathered her hair up. She had even asked Kara to paint her fingernails with colorful sparkly nail polish. Jamie examined her clothes carefully and sighed again, looking up.

"I still can't fly."

Alex smiled softly, gathering her daughter to her. "It's okay. There aren’t many people who can fly."

"Supergirl can."

"Supergirl is not a human. She is an alien."

"It doesn’t matter." Jamie shrugged. "She can fly."

Alex pulled her daughter’s hair away from her face, stroking her cheeks. "You know what, Peanut," she said in a low, mystery voice. "I know Supergirl from work. I'm sure I can ask her to give you a ride."

Jamie's eyes lit up. "Really? Wow, Mommy, that would be great! Please, please, can you talk to her? Please!"

Alex laughed. "Okay."

It was twilight, almost evening, and Maggie was in the kitchen, cooking dinner for the three of them while Alex and Jamie played in the backyard. The days got shorter and the air got cooler by the day, as the holidays approached in huge strides. Four-year-old Jamie was about to turn five very soon - she was born the day just before Christmas, and by chance it was the eighth night of Hanukkah as well. Alex and Maggie were excited for the little miracle that happened to them, knowing that from now on the holiday season would be doubled with happiness thanks to the little light that was added to their lives. Alex watched her daughter hop around the yard and jump up to try and catch the fireflies that came out towards evening, feeling warmth spreading in her chest. The door behind them opened.

"Food is ready," she heard Maggie's voice, and turned her head. Jamie leaped straight into Maggie's arms, which swung her up in the air.

"I hope you didn’t eat too many fireflies." She pulled her in, sending quick fingers to her ribs. Jamie began to squirm with giggles, until she got a sufficient amount of tickling and began to jump enthusiastically again.

"Mama! Mommy says she knows Supergirl! She can take me flying with her!"

"Is that so?" Maggie exchanged an amused look with Alex, who rose from her seat on the grass. Alex shrugged as Jamie continued to ramble.

"Please, please, Mama, let me fly with Supergirl! It will be-"

"We'll talk about this, sweetie. It’s dinner time now."

“Pancakes?" Jamie jumped again, as if what her body needed right now was more sugar. Maggie laughed and put the bouncy girl back on her feet.

"Macaroni with cheese. And vegetables."

Jamie grimaced.

"We can have ice cream for dessert." Alex winked, and Maggie let out another laugh.

"Only if you’ll finish what’s on your plate."

"Yes!" Jamie blurted and ran inside. Maggie approached Alex slowly.

"Supergirl is taking Jamie for a ride?" Maggie raised an eyebrow at her. Alex bit the inside of her cheek.

"She said she wanted to fly like a butterfly, or Supergirl. I told her I could check it out. I know you're not always excited about this, but... I thought you could give it to her. Maybe as a birthday present."

Maggie gave her a worried look, and Alex put a soft hand on her shoulder

"You don’t trust Kara?"

"Well, that's not exactly-"

"You trust her to catch me when I jump from a twenty-story building but you don’t trust her to take her niece for a ten-minute ride around the neighborhood?"

"Well, you should stop with that too. And you know it's not the same thing." She looked at her. Alex knew what Maggie was talking about. When you have a child, the whole world is reduced to one single spot, where your child is healthy, safe and sound, and nothing else matters. All your actions, all your thoughts, are subject to one thing, and that is to make sure that your child is happy, and if something happens to them, you will find ways to make those responsible pay. Jamie was a girl born out of love, out of light, and Alex and Maggie made sure to raise her that way.

Alex leaned over to kiss Maggie's forehead when out of the house suddenly came the sound of a broken plate, followed by a small "Uh-oh". Alex's lips were still pressed against Maggie's forehead as they both grinned quietly.

"I'll get a broom."

*

The following Saturday, Jamie got her ride in Supergirl's safe arms (after Alex and Maggie both made it clear to Kara that there was no scenario in which she didn’t return in one piece) and came back flushed and more bouncy than ever.

"Mommy, Mama, that was wonderful!" She hopped excitedly around, her eyes glowing. Kara stood not far away, handing out autographs to fans, and Alex and Maggie waited for her with Gertrude tied to a nearby tree, while Jamie continued to ramble. "We saw the whole town, and the people looked like tiny beetles, and Supergirl made a kind of spin like this— and like that—" She jumped up and turned again, her hand raised up in a pose. "It was amazing!"

"I'm glad you had fun, sweetie." Alex lifted her into a hug as Maggie put a hand on her back. "Flying with a supergirl is really a dream."

"Have you ever done that, Mommy?"

Alex exchanged a look with Maggie, swallowing a smile. "Maybe once or twice."

"Twice?" Jamie's eyes lit up again in the slightly dangerous Danvers-girl way, the one that Maggie knew exactly when and how to turn off in time.

"Okay, kiddo, that was nice. Can we consider this as your birthday present?"

Jamie frowned. "You didn’t tell me before."

Alex and Maggie burst out laughing and Gertrude barked, as if feeling the spark of joy in the air. As they kept laughing, Kara joined them in her plain clothes.

"Hey there, munchkin!"

"Aunt Kara!" Jamie leaped from Alex’s arms to Kara’s, who grabbed her with a laugh. Jamie almost forgot about Supergirl at the sight of her aunt, and Maggie untied Gertrude's leash, the five of them going out for Saturday brunch at Jamie's favorite place. Jamie hadn't stopped talking for one second, up until the moment a plate full of pancakes was placed in front of her. Despite the lack of genetics, Jamie was able to devour an entire plate full of pancakes without blinking just like her aunt, who sat right next to her, eliminating a double plate of pancakes. Alex tossed a piece of bread to Gertrude, who was lying under her chair, and grinned affectionately at the sight of Kara and Jamie, sitting side by side, passing the bottle of syrup between them.

"Whoa there, baby girl," Maggie said with a smile, wiping Jamie's chin with a napkin. "You could explode from all this sugar."

"Give the girl a rest, her birthday is soon," said Kara with a full mouth.

"Soon, not today," Alex remarked, and Jamie smiled a wide caramel smile.

"I want a dollhouse!"

"We will discuss this."

"Or a bicycle."

"You already have one."

"They've gotten too small." Jamie took another bite. "I want red ones."

Kara chuckled. "Ambition is important, Jay."

The day passed pleasantly for the Sawyer-Danvers family as they walked to the park. Jamie and Kara played tag with Gertrude, while Alex and Maggie sat under an oak tree, enjoying the shade and rest. Maggie's head rested on Alex's shoulder, and she sighed calmly.

"What do you want for the holiday?"

Maggie was silent for a few moments as she watched her daughter and her sister-in-law rejoicing, Gertrude barking as she leaped to knock Jamie down. Maggie’s hand fumbled to find Alex's.

"Nothing. I don't need anything. I have everything I want."

Alex smiled, squeezing her palm. "That's sweet, babe, but you'll have to give me a concrete answer."

Maggie raised her head, kissing Alex's cheek. Her face pressed to Alex's cheekbone as she took a deep breath, the smell of grass and Alex's perfume mingling sweetly in her nose. Alex squeezed her hand again, more gently.

"Of course, you don’t have to. I know that it’s not always... easy for you. To think about winter and... all that." Alex shouldn’t have said more. She knew Maggie's past was a traumatic event, remnants of which still haunted her at times, and Maggie didn’t always love Christmas. Though she now had a family that loved her, the winter was full of reminders of what she had been lacking for so many years. Icicles hanging from trees and snowy winds brought back memories of the people who never accepted her, who ignored her existence when it didn't suit them.Alex knew Maggie through and through, knew her story, her core. She tried to make every family holiday, every special occasion, every day, to be honest, a day to remind Maggie that she had a family, people who would love her unconditionally and a life to live to the fullest, where she could be true to herself.

Maggie didn’t answer. She was thankful for Alex's existence in her life, that she has a wife who knows exactly how to walk around the scars of her past. She shifted her head to rest on Alex's shoulder.

"You, Jamie, our whole family… you guys are everything I have. Everything I need."

Alex didn't have time to answer that before Jamie approached them, running and panting with a wide smile, Gertrude skipping behind her.

"I won!" Jamie jumped in place enthusiastically, her cheeks red. Maggie handed her a bottle of water as Kara approached as well, faking panting sounds.

"Jamie, you ran so fast!" Kara put her hands on her knees. Jamie giggled contentedly, hopping around Gertrude. Kara straightened up, stopping the panting while Jamie didn’t notice. Alex hid a smile.

"Gotta go. I have a deadline for a serious article tomorrow."

Alex nodded at her. "Thanks, Kara. See you on Monday!"

As Kara walked away, Jamie sat down on Maggie's lap.

"Mama, will you come play tag with me?"

“Why don't you rest for a few moments, Jay?" Alex removed a strand of dark hair from Jamie's eyes. "Mama and I really enjoy sitting peacefully under the tree."

Jamie rolled her eyes. "I wish Aunt Kara could stay."

Alex and Maggie burst out laughing and Maggie wrapped the girl in a crushing hug. Pulling back, Jamie burst into her usual stream of questions, as if directing her energy to speech instead of running around. Jamie loved to ask questions, and Alex sometimes wondered what it would be like to be a child again, with the whole world mysterious and open before you to discover. Jamie's eyes were fixed on the horizon and questions poured out of her mouth like a flood - why squirrels couldn't talk, how flowers got to the flower shop, and who was in charge of all the dogs in the world.

"I don’t think there is anyone like that," Maggie said patiently, as she answered all the other endless questions only a four-year-old girl could think of. Jamie was now sitting with her back to Maggie's chest, stroking Gertrude's soft fur.

"So who's in charge of Gertrude?"

"We are. Me, you, and Mom."

Jamie was silent. "Her family."

"Exactly."

Jamie dug into Gertrude's fur for a few more moments. "Why don't we have snow? I saw in a movie that it snows in winter, and now it is winter. My birthday is in the winter. And the holiday cards that were in the store had sparkles of snow on them, and there are ornate snowflakes hanging in my kindergarten class. Even Miss Cameron said it snows in winter. So why doesn’t it snow?"

"There is no snow in California." Alex scratched behind Gertrude's ear. "It's too hot in here. Even in Midville, where Grandma Eliza lives and Kara and I grew up, it never snows at Christmas or Hanukkah."

"Did you grow up in California, too, Mama?" Jamie looked up wide at Maggie, who stroked her hair.

"No. I grew up in Nebraska."

"And there's snow there?"

"Yeah, a lot. Every Christmas we would go out to the field, me and my cousins, and build snowmen, and have snowball fights, until our hands were frozen and our faces were red from the cold. Then we would go together to my aunt's house and drink hot chocolate together in the living room." Despite the memory of the family that abandoned her, her eyes gleamed as she spoke. "We had a great time every time it snowed."

Jamie's eyes were fascinated. "Really?" Her voice was faint,like it was trapped in a world where children played in the snow in a way she had never experienced, the chill of the snow seeping through their gloves. The cold, stinging air almost felt real around her.

"Really." Maggie smiled. "I miss that time very much."

"You do?" Alex asked, shifting slightly to turn her body to Maggie. Maggie looked up, her smile becoming a little sad.

"Yeah. Not everything went smoothly after that, but the time before, the family atmosphere we had, especially in the winter, was always good. The snow was wonderful, and everything that came with it."

Alex silently wondered what it was like to live in a world where winter was the season where there would always be joy, family, quality time and fun, a season where the cold outside emphasized the warmth inside. Suddenly all those great images shattered with the thought of never having a family like that, in the winter or at all. She wondered how Maggie had never really mentioned how much she loved winter, the snow, before her life turned upside down.

Jamie clasped her hands pleadingly, her eyes wide open. "Can we go there for the holiday? Please, Mom, please!"

Maggie bit her lip, the smile erasing slowly. She shook her head sadly.

"Why not?"

Alex came to the defense quickly. "It's very far away, sweetie. And Mommy and Mama should be here on holiday, in case of emergency, you know."

"Protect people from the bad guys." Jamie nodded, already knowing the importance of her moms’ jobs. "But please, Mom, snow sounds so fun, please-"

"I miss it too, Jamie. Very, very much." Maggie pulled Jamie to her for a hug. "But we can’t travel there. I'm sorry."

Jamie was silent, but remained hugged in Maggie's arms. Alex, feeling the need to change the mood, got up quickly, Gertrude not far behind.

"What do you say about that tag game?"

Jamie leaped quickly, the smile returning to her eyes as if it had never left. "Yes!" She cheered, and set off, Gertrude barking and following her. Alex looked back at Maggie, who mouthed, "thank you."

Alex sent her a kiss in the air and followed her daughter.

An idea was brewing in her mind and she began to plan.

*

A hand shook Maggie out of her sleep. The sunlight from the window flickered on her face, and she blinked several times, confused. A small head dug in under the blanket beside her.

"Mama," Jamie's voice whispered, "it's Christmas morning."

"It is," Maggie whispered back, still a little confused. The bed was empty. Where's Alex? "Why are you whispering?"

Jamie looked up at her, a feeling very much like staring into the mirror. "I don’t want to disturb mommy."

Maggie looked around. Alex wasn’t in bed, or anywhere in the room. The light in the adjoining bathroom was off, indicating her lack of presence. "What do you mean? Where is she?"

"She's making us something. A surprise." Jamie pressed a finger to her mouth. "I heard her talking to Aunt Kara. They're downstairs, in the backyard."

Maggie's heart pounded. What the hell is Alex planning? If Kara and Alex don’t know that Jamie has heard them, Kara's secret may be revealed if Kara does or says something out of place.

"What did they say, honey? Did you see them?" Maggie tried to sound light-hearted, intrigued, as she pulled Jamie closer.

"No, but Aunt Kara dropped something, and Mom said 'Shhh!' so I guessed it's a surprise. I didn’t want to disturb them." Jamie's eyes were wide open, clearly unable to hold back her curiosity. Maggie was surprised she had succeeded so far. "Can I go look at what they're doing?"

Maggie was intrigued as well, but knew Alex would come and wake them up when the time came. She looked at her nightstand clock, deciding to set aside twenty minutes for the matter. It was already quite late, and it was Christmas morning, after all.

Jamie agreed with clear reluctance, but wrapped her arms around Maggie, both curling up quietly, pretending to be asleep. Jamie went to bed pretty late the night before, and even the most energetic girl needed a few more hours of sleep. By the time Alex arrived, they had both already sunk back into a warm sleep in each other's arms.

"Hey." Maggie noticed that Alex's voice was tense with excitement, even if her body language was relaxed. "Good morning, Merry Christmas-"

"Mommy!" Jamie jumped at Alex. "Can we go downstairs already?"

Alex froze in the middle of a hug. "Jamie, did you see anything?"

"Uh..." Jamie glanced from Maggie to Alex. "No, I didn’t. Promise."

Alex and Maggie exchanged glances and Maggie raised an eyebrow, smiling. "Merry Christmas, sweetie. Let's go down and see what you've made for us."

They all went downstairs, Alex at the head, carrying Jamie with her shoulders hunched over. "I should have told Kara to be quieter."

"It's okay." Maggie got on her tiptoes to kiss Alex's cheek. "Whatever you prepared for us, I'm sure it’s..."

Her voice faded as she peered into the backyard. The yard, which was fenced with tall bushes and was filled with green grass and ornamental stones, had transformed completely overnight. A white, spotless rug of snow covered everything, and white flakes fluttered in the light morning breeze. Maggie stepped forward, rubbing her eyes. Is this a dream? Hasn't she woken up yet?

"Mom, what is this? Is that..." Jamie walked barefoot to the door, sliding it open. She reached forward. "Is that snow?"

"Yes. It's snow. Real snow." Alex's cheeks were flushed with excitement, and she bounced on the pads of her feet. "I wanted to give you two some- some snow, since we can’t really find real snow around here. I wanted... I wanted you to have Christmas, you know," she spoke mainly to Maggie now, while Jamie bent down to touch the thick layer of snow on the grass. "To give you the snow you once had."

Maggie tore her eyes from the wondrous sight of whiteness, of the flakes that continued, somehow, in some miraculous way, to fall from above. She looked at Alex, her eyes filling with tears.

"It... is it good? Is it okay? I asked for help from-" She lowered her voice, glancing at Jamie. "From Kara, I calculated the temperatures and everything, and she brought snow from... I think it was Utah, and she used her freeze breath to blow up some ice and we arranged snow here that will fall for the next... three hours, at least-" Alex talked quickly, blabbering as usual when she was stressed. Maggie shook her head and grabbed Alex's face in her hands, silencing her.

"Is it good?" Alex whispered again. Maggie noticed the tears in her eyes as well. "Is it what you used to have?"

"It's so much better," Maggie murmured, smiling against Alex's skin. She kissed her, and they clung to each other as the sunlight flickered through the clouds and onto their skin, the sun that hadn’t yet melted the snow her wife specially arranged for her. Alex's hands wrapped slowly around Maggie's waist, pulling her closer. The wind blew in, but they remained warm, Alex's lips against Maggie's, expressing without words, all the love she wanted to give her this morning and for the rest of her life.

They pulled back, leaning their foreheads together. Maggie looked deep into Alex's eyes, still holding her face in her palms, her thumb rubbing gently against her cheeks. Her past, all the things she went through and the horrible feelings that accompanied her for years, everything felt meaningless compared to the wonderful woman in front of her, the little life they created together. Every good thought and feeling she ever had banded together and floated up, filling her with happiness for the incredible life she got to live after all. Alex, sensitively, wisely, lovingly, knew how to recreate exactly the warm and delightful Christmas morning feeling from Maggie's early, happy childhood, a feeling that intensified with the wonderful upgrade of the family she now had. She couldn’t have asked for a better gift.

"I love you," she murmured, the words unable to capture the immense love she was feeling now. Alex nodded, and one tear ran down her cheek as she leaned over to kiss Maggie again.

"I love you too," Alex sighed. She wrapped her arms tighter around. "So, so much-"

"Mommy, mommy!" They heard Jamie's voice from outside. Maggie had never heard her daughter more enthusiastic. She quickly wiped away her tears and pulled back from Alex to look at Jamie standing outside, her feet drenched in the frozen snow.

"Jamie, it's frozen outside! Come on in and put on something!" Alex laughed. Jamie just picked up more and more thick piles of snow in her hands, tossing them in the air while giggling loudly. Thin pieces of snow landed on her nose and hair, decorating them slowly.

Alex tightened her coat to her body and went out, shoveling through the snow and grabbing Jamie, lifting her high. Jamie laughed wildly, waving her hand in the air. Maggie leaned against the doorframe, watching her wife and daughter laugh their heads off, as the snow continued to fall around them and drag under Alex's jubilant boots. There were many things to do - tidy up the messy kitchen from yesterday, make breakfast, turn on the heating- but Maggie couldn’t take her eyes off the mesmerizing sight of her two favorite people in the world, over the moon with joy, against the white background that covered everything.

"Come on, young lady," Alex finally exhaled, flushed. "Go wear some warm clothes."

"And we'll do a snowball fight?" Jamie's eyes twinkled, her dimples gracefully stretched across her cheeks. Maggie gathered her up in a hug. All her memories with the snow suddenly seemed so far away with the anticipation for this day, and for gathering new memories with her real family.

"I'll tell you what." She smiled at her mischievously. "Go get dressed, and we'll go out, and then we’ll sit in front of the tree with hot chocolate and open the presents. What do you say?"

Jamie didn’t even answer, immediately leaping down the hall to her room, cheering loudly. Gertrude rose from her dog bed on the front porch, rushing after Jamie with a bark. Maggie laughed, turning to look outside again. Alex hugged her from behind, her chin fitting perfectly in the curve of her neck. They looked at the soft snowflakes and the paths that Alex's boots created as she swung Jamie through the air.

 _Thank you, I love you, you’re the best._ Words weren’t enough. Words would never be enough. And maybe Alex understood that already, proving her love in deeds. Maggie thought about the series of books Alex had been hunting down for months and months in every bookstore, about the noise-canceling headphones that would be useful to her when she was on red-eye flights and had to stay alert the next morning, everything that was waiting for her, wrapped under the tree. Words weren’t enough, and sometimes, even deeds felt so small in the face of the fire burning in her chest and the endless love she had for her wife.

All she had left was to stay in the moment, and in all the moments that follow, and to love, to love with all her heart.

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know the first thing about snow or christmas, so i hope i got most of it right lol  
> thank you erin for beta-ing this for me!
> 
> and thank you for reading! make sure to leave a comment or kudos if you liked it :)  
> i'm bilerleighs on twitter
> 
> happy holidays everyone, and stay safe 3>


End file.
